I too was one of them bullies, but I was luckly to have been with Jean (at my St James 50 year class reunion) and was able to tell her that I was sorry. We had a very good talk. I felt good afterwared.
Most of the Class of '63 and most rest of the school were guilty of picking on these poor girls. Looking back, I don't understand or excuse it. I think there is some need, especially by teenagers, to distract from their own failings by pointing out the failings of others. But, that is not an excuse for the cruelty that was inflicted on these two girls.
May they rest in peace and my the rest of us be forgiven.
If only we could all live by THE GOLDEN RULE...but, when you're young, you're not wise enough., The pressures of youth, of acceptance are great and stupid mistakes are often made....We can only learn from our mistakes and ask for forgiveness from those we have wronged ...and from our Lord who will eventually judge us all. My prayers are with the Fabian family.
At one of our past reunions, we received a letter from Joanne which we read at the reunion. She had said that the thought of coming to the reunion and seeing all the people who made fun of her and her sister made her sick to her stomach. She further went on to say that she had a husband and children who loved her and that she had raised her children not to tease and bully others the way she was in high school. It brought tears to my eyes and still does when i think of them and how mean others were to them. I can only hope that she and her sister had a happy fulfilled life. They are bigger people than all those who tormented them. God bless you Joanne and Jean.
I agree with all comments here. I remember both Jean & Joanne very well. I had classes with both. I sadly remember all the cruel & heartless comments & looks both girls endured on a daily basis. I can still see them going thru the halls & sitting in classrooms, usually with their heads down.
Unfortunately, they were not the only students who were made fun of, teased, etc.
If you weren't physically "cute" in face & body; If you didn't have the cutest & latest clothing styles; If the girls' hair style & make-up wasn't awesome........then you just weren't "IN."
There were a lot of students ignored & worse by others who thought they were so much better. Back then no one realized all of that behavior was bullying.
We know better now & hopefully we have all taught our children & grandchildren that no one is better than anyone else.
My sympathy, also, goes out to Joanne's family. I remember pairng up with either Jean or Joanne in classes, such as gym, when no one else would. They were very sweet girls. I cannot imagine what they went through in school-to the extent described. I, too, had episodes of bing made fun of and not being included in any functions outside of school. Never invited to any parties, sleepovers, picnics at Petrifying Springs, I was never asked out. Hearing of everyone else's experiences, but never being "goog enough" or part of any "IN" group hurt so much. A smile, a hello, any positive recogniton would have meant so much to Jean and Joanne. As adults, I pray we are all better people. Reach out, smile, accept-we are all special people -each put on this earth for a specific reason.. Bless you both, Jean and Joanne.
The treatment of the Fabian sisters has bothered me for years. While going through initiation for the Red Triangle, I was told by the upper classmen to propose on one knee to Joanne. That incident has bothered me to this day. I will use that expeirence to teach my grandsons about being a bully and try to make them understand how they woud feel being treated in the same way. For some reason, I feel that writing our thoughts after Joanne's death is not enough. We owe both, Joanne and Jean much much more.
I knew the Fabian twins since first grade at St James School. I always felt so bad for them as they certainly were treated as absolute outcasts. I can't even imagine going through all grades of school and high school feeling this way. As children we don't always realize how awful this treatment must feel. Throughout our years in grade school, I don't remember ever being reprimanded by the nuns/teachers about our treatment of these girls. When I see the awful bullying that goes on today in some of our schools, I cringe for both those affected and those doing the bullying. Hopefully with more and more emphasis on this awful practice the children/young adults will finally learn the awful, sometimes fatal, results of such behavior. I hope that she is finally at peace with herself and can forgive all the words that were said that hurt both of them. Rest in peace.
Michael Kwas
I second that
Rodney Bruno
I too was one of them bullies, but I was luckly to have been with Jean (at my St James 50 year class reunion) and was able to tell her that I was sorry. We had a very good talk. I felt good afterwared.
Joan & Jean my prayers are with you.
Rodney
John R. Collins
Most of the Class of '63 and most rest of the school were guilty of picking on these poor girls. Looking back, I don't understand or excuse it. I think there is some need, especially by teenagers, to distract from their own failings by pointing out the failings of others. But, that is not an excuse for the cruelty that was inflicted on these two girls.
May they rest in peace and my the rest of us be forgiven.
John Collins
Wayne Morton
If only we could all live by THE GOLDEN RULE...but, when you're young, you're not wise enough., The pressures of youth, of acceptance are great and stupid mistakes are often made....We can only learn from our mistakes and ask for forgiveness from those we have wronged ...and from our Lord who will eventually judge us all. My prayers are with the Fabian family.
Patricia Adams (Kriederman)
At one of our past reunions, we received a letter from Joanne which we read at the reunion. She had said that the thought of coming to the reunion and seeing all the people who made fun of her and her sister made her sick to her stomach. She further went on to say that she had a husband and children who loved her and that she had raised her children not to tease and bully others the way she was in high school. It brought tears to my eyes and still does when i think of them and how mean others were to them. I can only hope that she and her sister had a happy fulfilled life. They are bigger people than all those who tormented them. God bless you Joanne and Jean.
Virginia McPherson (Muenchow)
So very sorry for all of the pain that the girls endured. Be free and happy with God for ever and ever. Sincere sympathy to all family members.
Jo Anne Palmer
I agree with all comments here. I remember both Jean & Joanne very well. I had classes with both. I sadly remember all the cruel & heartless comments & looks both girls endured on a daily basis. I can still see them going thru the halls & sitting in classrooms, usually with their heads down.
Unfortunately, they were not the only students who were made fun of, teased, etc.
If you weren't physically "cute" in face & body; If you didn't have the cutest & latest clothing styles; If the girls' hair style & make-up wasn't awesome........then you just weren't "IN."
There were a lot of students ignored & worse by others who thought they were so much better. Back then no one realized all of that behavior was bullying.
We know better now & hopefully we have all taught our children & grandchildren that no one is better than anyone else.
Candace Andersen (Penkalski)
My sympathy, also, goes out to Joanne's family. I remember pairng up with either Jean or Joanne in classes, such as gym, when no one else would. They were very sweet girls. I cannot imagine what they went through in school-to the extent described. I, too, had episodes of bing made fun of and not being included in any functions outside of school. Never invited to any parties, sleepovers, picnics at Petrifying Springs, I was never asked out. Hearing of everyone else's experiences, but never being "goog enough" or part of any "IN" group hurt so much. A smile, a hello, any positive recogniton would have meant so much to Jean and Joanne. As adults, I pray we are all better people. Reach out, smile, accept-we are all special people -each put on this earth for a specific reason.. Bless you both, Jean and Joanne.
Michael Serpe
The treatment of the Fabian sisters has bothered me for years. While going through initiation for the Red Triangle, I was told by the upper classmen to propose on one knee to Joanne. That incident has bothered me to this day. I will use that expeirence to teach my grandsons about being a bully and try to make them understand how they woud feel being treated in the same way. For some reason, I feel that writing our thoughts after Joanne's death is not enough. We owe both, Joanne and Jean much much more.
Roxanne Ricker (Cieszynski)
I knew the Fabian twins since first grade at St James School. I always felt so bad for them as they certainly were treated as absolute outcasts. I can't even imagine going through all grades of school and high school feeling this way. As children we don't always realize how awful this treatment must feel. Throughout our years in grade school, I don't remember ever being reprimanded by the nuns/teachers about our treatment of these girls. When I see the awful bullying that goes on today in some of our schools, I cringe for both those affected and those doing the bullying. Hopefully with more and more emphasis on this awful practice the children/young adults will finally learn the awful, sometimes fatal, results of such behavior. I hope that she is finally at peace with herself and can forgive all the words that were said that hurt both of them. Rest in peace.